I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize