We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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