I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize