do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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