She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
How's work?
Spinning.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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