he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize