Say something about gay babies.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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