Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
