Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
