so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
