morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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