i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
