If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
