lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
