somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
