I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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