butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
