I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
