I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
