margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
