Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Randomize
