My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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