No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Two words: nipple clamps
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