Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
