Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
