I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize