there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
