Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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