but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
