Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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