3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Everything about him screamed your future.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
