You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
