i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Randomize
