11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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