at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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