You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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