oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
