She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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