Will you blow on my dice?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
