I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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