Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
