Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
