Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
