Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize
