The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
