Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
