We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
