Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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