Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
