You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
