turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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