How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
